| The Error Message Is: | Which Really Means: |
| Press any key to continue | You can press any key you want, how many times you want; I won't budge. |
| Serious error. Contact technical support and give error message number 1A4-2546512430E. | You'll be placed on hold for ten minutes and then be disconnected, because we really don't care what your problem is. |
| Installing program to C:\PROGRAM FILES\... | ...and while I'm at it, I'll put some files in C:\WINDOWS and C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM, where you'll never find them. |
| Insert diskette 11... | ...because I'm very well aware you only have ten diskettes. |
| Not enough memory. | I don't care if you have 128 megs of RAM, I wan't the parts below 640 k. |
| Unable to read from drive D:... | ...but if you insert the CD with the RIGHT side up, it might work. |
| Please stand by... | ...for ever and ever. |
| That catalogue does not exist... | ...anymore. Oops. |
| Unexpected error; quitting | Actually, we knew all along that this would eventually happen, we just didn't feel like debugging the program. |
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