In the lobby of a hotel in Bukarest:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

In a lift in Leipzig:
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

An ad by a dentist in Hongkong:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

At a laundromat in Rome:
Ladies, please leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

At the entrance of a shop in Mallorca:
English well speaking.

At a hotel next to a Russian-Orthodox monastery in Moscow:
You are welcome to visit the cemetary where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists ans writers are buried daily, except Thursday.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

In a zoo in Budapest:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, please give it to the guard on duty.

In consulting rooms in Rome:
Specialist in women and other diseases.

In the window of a Swedish fur shop:
Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.

On a roadwork sign in Kyushu:
Stop. Drive sideways.

In a hotel in Athens:
Customers are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 am daily.

In a ticket office at the airport of Copenhagen:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.

In a Norwegian coctail bar:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.